One Apple A Day #699 – The Big Red Button

Within the big factory, all the workers are busy doing their jobs. They are all focused on their tasks, doing the best they can. Some of them are tired, but they know that they can’t just stop. Some are not sure about what they’re doing, they just know it’s essential, and for them, it’s enough. They can feel the eyes of the big boss on their shoulders. The owner is watching them. When their shift is finished, they leave the place to someone else to go home. They can’t say they are happy, and sometimes they wonder what would happen if they stop working. But hey, it’s just a dream, the work must go on, and there’s nothing they can do to stop it.

Up there on the wall, where the big bosses have their offices, there is a big fat red button. Nobody knows what it is for. 

Then one day, someone, it must be one of the bosses, enters the big factory and pushes the big red button. 

A weird noise fills the air, and then, all of a sudden, complete silence. All the machines stop working.

All the workers are shocked. The silence is quickly replaced by whispers and rumours. 

“What should we do? Do we have to go home? So it was possible to stop this? And now?”

***

The Big Red Button is an image that my dear friend Vanessa gave me a few days ago. And this morning this story came out of my fingers, without thinking really.

Sometimes I feel that we’ve convinced ourselves that we are just cogs in a machine. 

What can I do? The real power is somewhere else, in someone else hands. It all feels unstoppable. It is what it is. Until someone or something comes, and push the big red button.

But do we really have to wait for that? Are we really without power? Or is it just a story we tell ourselves to feel good doing nothing?

And now that something has pushed that big red button, what can I do?


Photo by włodi on Flickr

One Apple A Day #697 – senseless

This morning, I have no ideas for my writing practice.
Or better, I have too many fragments of ideas but no one good enough to start.
It’s not the first time. It happens more often than I’d like.
And even if I should be used to this feeling by now, it still makes me feel uncomfortable. Not enough to stop me, obviously. Otherwise, I wouldn’t make it so far.
I also learned that if I keep writing, my hands will often find something that my mind could not see. Because my mind loves to play games with me. In particular the game of sense-making.
Anytime a feeling, emotion or an intuition appears in my awareness, my mind begins immediately its quest to find meaning. No matter how hard I try, I can’t stay with something I sense for long, without trying to make sense of it.
Yet, I know that not everything must make sense.
Like this post.
That’s why I’m stopping it here.
How long will I be able to stay with what I’m sensing without making sense of it?

One Apple a Day #696 – renewing of the relationships

I had a lot of time to think this morning. My alarm went off at 5 am but my body refused to move until 8. It wasn’t really thinking to be honest. It was more like walking on the thin line between the wakeful and the dreaming state. As if my body, mind and soul were trying to find a fleeting alignment. 

When I finally woke up, that feeling of disconnection was still there. 

A disconnection between what I feel, what I think, and what I do.

So, I sat on my couch in silence, and I picked a Be The Change card to guide my recentering. And the card in an invitation to “renewing the relationships that are already there“.

And in my morning recentering the way forward emerged. 

Somehow, I convinced myself that I needed to be whole and centred, to nourish my connections with others. But what if it works the other way round? What if it is through nurturing and strengthening my relationships that I can find my center?

One Apple A Day #695 – Walk the Talk!

You’ve probably read or heard this expression quite often. 

To walk the talk is an idiomatic expression meaning to do what we say, to align our actions with our words.

For more info about the meaning and origin of this expression, check out The Phrase Finder.

This post is a confession. Yes, I’m guilty of not walking my talk.

I’ve been talking about the importance of finding our own rhythm, about creating space to rest and recover, on how vital it is to take care of our energy. Particularly now, that this lockdown has disrupted our rhythm.

And yet, here I am. Stretching myself to finish stuff that would take me half the time if I was fully present. Skipping the time to recover to keep up and in doing so, depleting my energy and my focus even more.

This morning my rituals feel like a chore. 

And I’m grateful for it. It reminds me that even the things we love and enjoy the most can become a burden if we are not aware and present.

To walk the talk, we must be present. So our walk becomes our talk.

How often do I allow my talk to go where I’m not ready to walk? 

One Apple A Day #693 – too much

Strange days are these. Even if I feel that day after day, everything looks a little less odd than the day before. Do you?

In these strange days, sometimes I feel it’s just too much.
Too much news.
Too much talking.
Too many data and numbers.
Too many meetings and videocall.
Too much thinking.
Too much fear
Too many forecasts, analysis and explanations.
Too much cleaning, training, fixing, changing.
Too many classes.
Too much learning, preparing and improving.
Too much need to prove this is a catastrophe or an opportunity.
Too much trying to be better, stronger, smarter.
Too much doing.

Sometimes it is overwhelming.

This morning, when I opened the window, I heard the voices of animals I never heard before.
Isn’t it ironic?
While outside, the world has gone silent, inside there is too much noise.